开心

Don’t yearn for the days of the past and don’t live for the future, live now.

When my first marriage had a hard time, I was very sad for myself. Then, after my first husband died, I left my teaching job and tried to do business. I thought that if I worked hard I’ll be successful. That if I keep myself busy, I wont need anyone’s help. I can forget the past. I thought this would be easy.

In my first year of business I lost a lot of money and I never have time to look after my son. I was very sad. I was sad for my life. Also, I didn’t forget my past. I couldn’t feel any happiness in my life.

My parents worried about me, mother always looked after my son and tried to help me. My father often asked me about my thinking. He said to me, “if you need someone to talk to, come home and talk to us. If you want cry, come home and cry to us. Our home’s door is always open to you.” This let me feel very warm. I still talk to my parents every day. I know they are in the sky and they listen to me and help me each day. It was my parents’ help that got me through the hard time.

I remember that during the hard time I once went home and cried to my parents. I said “I can’t feel any happy”. My father waited for me to calm down and then he said, “I read a book, I forgot who wrote this book, but the writer’s words have accompanied me my whole life. When I had the hard times in cultural revolution and I couldn’t supported myself, I just reminded myself what the writer had said, that any good things or bad things they come and they go. When good things come be happy and enjoy them. When bad things come, don’t be sad, remember, like the good things, they will pass. He said, don’t yearn for the days that have past and don’t fancy the future, live now. If you live just in the now, then your life will become easy. Remember good times, they will pass, bad times they will pass.”

I listened to my father, he continued, “the people feeling unhappy, the reason, not just that life is stressful, the people are using their life to repent the past and worry about the future. This just like you carry two large weights on a pole balanced over your shoulder. How can you not be feeling tired? If you throw away the bad things from the past and also stop living for the future, the weights become light and easy to carry. The 'now' is the light pole on your shoulder which shouldn't be weighed down by too much past, too much future. So, live in the now, my daughter. Enjoy what you have; find your happiness.”

“And remember, the past days you can’t relive, the future hasn’t come, you can’t live in it. You can only live now, this moment.”

Yes, I have best parents, I have a lovely son, I have a lot of friends who always care of me and support me. I have a lot, why I am unhappy? I got through that hard time.

I understood what my father told me and I try always to remember it, but I sometimes I forget. I find myself thinking about the bad times in the past, or waiting for the future to be happy. I forget that all I need to be happy is here, in the now: my son, my husband, my family, my friends, a beautiful sky, a phone call, a rose in my garden, a lovely meal, a smile from a stranger. Yes, all I need is here, in the now.

Last night, I talked to my brother on the phone, he reminded me of what my father said.
I would like to tell anybody, try live in the now, make your life be easy.